I hope people will stop asking me what I'm going to do with my life. Yes, I realize that I haven't received any enlistment letters yet and it is only 'most probably' that they will call me up soon to Sembawang camp where I'll do my time. Most probably, it isn't die hard for sure, but I can live with that.. I also can live with the fact that right now I don't have any certain plans for the future nor do I have a job.
Yep, you could put your money on the fact that I'm probably gonna end up as a screwup.. Or you could have some faith and believe I'll somehow get rich and successful with a lot grit (possibly some luck) and a gung-ho approach to life. I figured, hey I'm 20, rescued myself from certain death a couple of times already.. I bet I can keep on doing this..
Fact is people get tired of life.. and when they do, they end up killing themselves. It might not be instant shoot-yourself-in-the-head-suicide.. but excessive alcohol/drug intake, living like a vampire or any of that kinda crap sorta qualifies as killing yourself too.
Now I'm really tired of life, I guess the sensible thing to do is not to kill myself but to just drop everything. Don't carry any weights, don't even think of carrying the weight of the world. just drop it, it could be the best thing you've done in your life cause nature has it that things will restore itself, and it's just liberating. Oh, and thats assuming you weren't trying to control nature in the first place.
Heck, even if you were indeed carrying the whole world on your shoulders, no one would be left to blame you even if you somehow dropped it!
-If we're leaving we don't stop livin', you know
-Franz Ferdinand
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